Why every rejection gets you closer: a growth mindset guide for HR job seekers

The irony hits differently when you're three months into a job search with nothing to show for it. As a senior HR leader, you've hired countless employees for your team and recruited senior leaders for your organization. You've coached them through the onboarding process, celebrated their milestones, and helped them grow in the organization.

Yet here you are. You are questioning whether to abandon HR entirely. You are exhausted from carrying your organization's emotional weight. And you are confronting an uncomfortable truth: having an impressive internal brand means nothing when the external market goes silent. No responses to applications. No feedback after interviews. Just the growing whisper in the back of your head that maybe you were never as good as you thought.

The fixed mindset trap in job searching

The problem isn't your skills or experience. It's your mindset. I recently reread Mindset by psychologist Carol Dweck. When you approach job searching with a fixed mindset, every rejection becomes evidence of your inadequacy. Every unanswered application confirms you’re not good enough. Every interview that doesn't lead to an offer proves you've lost your touch.

This fixed mindset creates urgency to succeed perfectly and immediately. There's no room for learning or growth when everything feels like a permanent judgment of your worth. You need that next role to validate that you're still the capable leader you've always been.

But here's what fixed mindset thinking costs you: it robs you of the very strengths that made you successful in HR—curiosity, resilience, and the ability to learn from feedback.

Mindset by Carol Dweck

Why a growth mindset matters

Growth mindset changes everything about job searching. Instead of each interaction being a test of your fixed abilities, every conversation becomes data. Every rejection becomes insight. Every interview becomes practice that gets you closer to the right opportunity.

It was our first coaching session and my client had just been made redundant from her role in banking. She asked me, “What’s the key differentiator in your clients who land jobs quickly, and those who don’t?” Without hesitation, I said, “Mindset.” From the incredulous look on her face, I knew she didn’t believe me. Frankly, I even surprised myself a bit with this answer. For those of you that have worked with me, you know I’m not (what I call) an “airy fairy” coach! But it’s true. In all of my years of coaching leaders who are looking for a new role, mindset matters more than anything else – even qualifications, relationships and resumes.

When you're not defending your ego, you can actually hear what hiring managers are telling you about their market needs, skill gaps, or cultural fit. You can adjust your approach, refine your story, or even discover that the role you thought you wanted isn't actually aligned with where you want to go.

Growth mindset also eliminates the shame around career pivoting. If your abilities can be developed, then exploring new directions isn't an admission that you've failed at HR—it's evidence that you're strategic about your future. I work with many HR leaders who want to move into a more commercially focused role and have P&L management responsibilities. I help them to pivot into roles like COO, sales, consultant and business development specialist.

As Dweck says, “In the fixed mindset, everything is about the outcome. The growth mindset allows people to value what they’re doing regardless of the outcome.” My clients who are able to make the pivot out of HR believe that their talent can be developed to allow them to fulfill their potential.

Practical ways to apply the growth mindset to your job search

• Treat every interaction as market research, not a test. Each conversation gives you data on industry trends, compensation ranges, and company cultures, regardless of the outcome.

• Rejection is redirection. That "no" might be saving you from a toxic environment or misaligned role. Trust the process while gathering intelligence.

• Separate your worth from your timeline. Your value isn't measured by search speed—it's demonstrated by how you navigate uncertainty and maintain integrity under pressure.

  
  

Your Next Step

Choose one upcoming networking conversation or interview this week. Instead of going in desperate to prove your worth, approach it with curiosity: What can you learn about this organization, this role, or this industry? What questions can you ask that demonstrate your strategic thinking rather than your need for validation?

This approach worked for my client Tanya. After her role moved overseas, she had been looking for a new position for 9 months. Increasingly frustrated with the challenging market, she decided to shift her mindset around networking to curiosity instead of, “What can I get out of this interaction?” By making this shift, she found she was suddenly open to new opportunities, she was more giving of her time and more willing to make connections for the simply purpose of helping someone out. Withing a few months, she had a number of new opportunities that led to her establishing a portfolio career, something she never anticipated trying!

As you can see from Tanya’s example, this single mindset shift—from proving to learning—will transform not just how you search, but what you ultimately find.

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I work with female senior leaders in Human Resources who feel stuck to help them love their work or find work they love. I write about:

👂 Executive & career coaching

📄 Career development and career transition

🎯 Job search strategy

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